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Trying to please different sized bridesmaids is driving me crazy

posted 1 year ago in Bridesmaids Dress

Trying to please different sized bridesmaids is driving me crazy :  wedding 5998 Oasi DtsTrying to please different sized bridesmaids is driving me crazy :  wedding 5695 Oasi DtsTrying to please different sized bridesmaids is driving me crazy :  wedding 5685 Oasi Dts

 

I have met my first match in wedding planning....FINDING BRIDESMAID DRESSES!!!!! i have 9 girls (i only wanted 4 but here I am at 9!!!) all ranging from 5" 105lbs to 5"11 plus size. i want to be able to accomodate everyone and it is so far driving me nuts. i love this color and fabric (dessy collection oasis) and these so far are three of the picks i think I will offer my girls but I feel like I need more options.....did you give your girls the option to pick whatever they want or did you decide on a few styles and then let them pick? I have to moniter two of my girls who..if they could...would pick a dress that is for a night out in VEGAS rather then a black tie optional wedding

posted by jleighr 1 year ago

I actually went through this as well. My girls range from age 14 to 34, sizes 0 to 12. I chose a dessy dress (just like the ones you are showing), after six style 6639. I found that it was flattering on all of the girls because of the draping and they all loved it. Good luck :)Trying to please different sized bridesmaids is driving me crazy :  wedding Charcoal

posted by gummie310@yahoo.com 1 year ago

I encountered much the same problem (girls ages 13-42, prepubescent athlete to curvy had two kids kinda bodies), add to it three girls that just DON'T wear dresses and I was in for a hard find. But I had long ago decided I didn't want everyone wear the same dress - I had seen some weddings like this and LOVED IT. So I walked into my first bridal shop with five of my eight bridesmaids and my mom, I easily explained I wanted royal blue short dresses for the bridesmaids and long dress for my Maid of Honor other than that the girls could choose. The bridal consultant was appalled informed me that I was crazy and it would look terrible, I HAD to pick one designer, one color, one material and preferablly dresses with similar styles - otherwise it would look crazy and disjointed.

Well needless to say I left that bridal shop with no dresses and a bad taste in my mouth. Two months later I walk into a bridal shop looking for my wedding dress with my mom, grandmother and one of my bridesmaids in tow. Needless to say the service was incredible and I found a  gorgeous dress, but then she suggests we check out bridemaids dresses. The consultant recommends that I pick a designer and a material - however, she suggests a company (I wish I could remember the name of it) that will make any style dress in any color or fabric they carry....  I however fell in LOVE with Bill Levkoff's designs. I settled on my horizon blue in european satin and charmeuse (the textiles felt and looked very similar. The girls could then select ANY dress that was made by him in those fabrics. This resulted in 8 girls in 8 different dresses, each finding a dress the look and feel smashing in but the dresses still have similar feels to them. Even better I bought some extras to tie the dresses together. Each girl gets the same pin and a pashmina (in our awesome lime green color) that will tie all the dresses together for pictures. I even decided to let the girls pick the shoes they want (must be pewter silver and dressy) but my 13 year old cousin can't walk in heels but some of my bridesmaids don't want to look like children next to the seriously tall groomsmen.

Needless to say I gave the girls alot of variety, alot of choices to make and because of that I believe they were more interested in my opinion and more willing to cave on the things I felt strongly about (nails french (fake nails if you bite them) and hair - updo). All my girls bought dresses they love (no one complained about price and it was a joy to go shopping!

My recommendation if you are going to give options I say be as relaxed or as strict about it as you want, but just tell them you get final approval (nothing wrong with that) on any dress especially because it is black tie optional.

posted by luckyduckinlove 1 year ago

I had girls ranging from a size 2 to a size 26, with all different shapes. I felt that it would be unfair for me to treat them as equals, so after bringing most of them to look at dresses, we decided long chiffon dresses would be the most flattering overall, and that I would let everyone pick their own style. We also went with Bill Levkoff, and the amount of options they have is great. I asked them not to pick a few styles, because they had weird embellishments, but everyone seemed happy with the selections that were available. I felt bad asking the girls to spend $200+ for a dress they will wear one time, but I think the fact that they got to choose it versus me telling them "this is what you are buying" helped them feel better about the price, and if they don't like how they look in their dress, it's their fault.

 

Bridesmaids dresses have been my greatest challenge as well so far, and I don't think its uncommon. We want to please our friends, but deep down, we want to do what we have always visualized for our weddings, and these things conflict.

posted by megn133 1 year ago

thank you very much ladies for your past experiences and ways you handeled them, I am just going a little crazy and I know I am looking early but this is why lol

I thought i knew who my maid of honor would be and well that changed, i had no idea i'd be having 9 girls rather then the 4 i wanted and it truely is hard to make one dress accomodate so many different sizes! I feel I need to go long because well I have one girl who the last thing she wants to wear is a dress let a lone trying to put her in a pair of strappy heels and I have three others who I know whill not wear a strappy heel I picl either so..long it is so they can wear whatever the hell they want on their feet...so...that and the color have settled on NO MATTER WHAT THEY SAY from there well...I have till September-Novemberish to decide...i will go crazy i just know it lol

but thank you for your words it really helps

posted by jleighr 1 year ago

We chose the dessy dress too, the one that was posted by  gummie310@yahoo.com. My bridesmaids are so different and still it looked perfect on all of them.

posted by bunicuta 10 months ago

the after six style 6639 that you both have used sems like a great choice, now just have to get two of my girls in it to see! aahhh the crazy bridesmaid dress search starts back up :)

posted by jleighr 10 months ago

I had exactly the same situation as you, after 3-4 shopping trips with them, I searched online and oordered this 

 

http://www.missguided.co.uk/harriet-gathered-chiffon-look-maxi-dress-40609


And told them that was the dress :-)

posted by Maddy87uk 9 months ago

Just solved this same type of problem. My five girls range from a size six to a 26. My maid of honor (the FI sister) is tall and skinny with a small chest. I also have a matron of honor (FI's older sister) and she's 5'3, plus size, and a huge chest that she is uncomfortable with. I wanted everyone to be comfortable. I also wanted them to be comfortable with the price. I was so stressed out about it. My FI felt the wrath. I let them pick their own dresses. They're the same length, color, material. The skirts of the dress are exaclty the same, but the tops are all different. I think it'll be fun. Between my five girls we will have three different dresses. eshakti.com if you wanted to check it out. My girls got a steal for 50$ and they came in so quickly!

 

posted by achele 9 months ago

thank you ladies for your help Laughing i would normally do what achele did and pick a designer, fabric & length and let them all choose but one of my girls (long story short but driving me insane!!!!) would choose a dress two inches below her butt and practically the same coverage as a teeny tiny bikini on top so that her chest is hanging out....as she says,,she wants to "slut it up"... wtf!!! this is really the only reason i am going crazy over these darn dresses..well that and prices (would never want to financially hurt any one of my 9 girls ever no matter what)

so i am going to navigate through the above emails and see what i can find :) thanks ladies

posted by jleighr 9 months ago

I know what you mean. Tell them you're going for classy and not sexy. The good thing about the dresses I picked is that the shortest one is knee length. She'd have to get it altered, and because you're the boss you can tell her no! Good lucky. I understand your frusteration!!

posted by achele 9 months ago

Yep I had the same request from a couple girls to make them sexy...I told them its my wedding not a club! Lol..And as most of my girl were average size  I did have one girl my bf  that was on the heavy set side and she begged me to get something loose. I didnt ask for any of the bridesmaids opinions on dresses because i knew all 9 would have a different answer and didnt want to go crazy..so I ended up going with What I liked and invisioned...and if they care about you and love you they will wear whatever you ask because it's your special day!

Ohh and all 3 dresses you picked are very pretty I like them all :)

 

posted by Calit 9 months ago

I had 7 bridesmaids of very differing sizes and shapes so I opted for the most flattering style that looked amazing on everyone.  Long and flowy.  One option you can consider is choosing the colour and length.....and then having different options for them for the top...ie....strapless, halter, spaghettstep straps etc.  And they can decide on what they are most comfortable with.  OR....you choose what you like coz after all it's your wedding and you're the one who will be looking at the pics for the rest of your life so you need to be completely happy with their dresses.  Tongue Out  

I have pics on my profile if you want some inspiration.  Smile

posted by KackyW 9 months ago

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